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Club Review December 15, 2006
 
Katz' Krib
By Hannah Katz Browse author
 
 

There's a Russian saying that says a lot more about their culture than the simple word implies. It's "svoi," pronounced "svah-yee," and what it means is "our people." Or something like that.

For the first time since I moved to Moscow, I can say that I'm reviewing a club that is really "svoi." The club is called 1171. It's Moscow's newest, and this season's biggest club opening. And it's all my people.

The reason it's my people is that the publisher of this paper and of the Russian nightlife journal Ne Spat, Kostya Bukarev, is the man behind 1171. He's the same guy that started and ran the Nightlife Awards for years, and he also opened the restaurant/tusovka Dacha in the Chisty Prudy area, one of my favorite places in Moscow until it closed down.

Kostya and "our boys" have clearly moved on up in the world. I like men with ambition and a future. I mean, check out the eXile with their high-society rebranding party on the 34th floor of the elite Swissotel! Difference is, the eXholes, as the editors call themselves, didn't give me an invite to their rebranding party, because they said it was "strictly limited to VIP" or some shit like that. Personally, I take pride in knowing I'm not "VIP" according to the definition of a regular jerk like Mark Ames.

And that's what's so cool about 1171. While the eXile is going way too upscale, 1171 is the first new big-ass bar/club that's bucking the whole elitny trend. It's located on the up-and-coming Savvinskaya Naberezhnaya, where all sorts of restaurants and cafes are opening where some factory warehouses once were.

Last Friday night was the grand opening, and let me tell you it was fucking packed. Total chaos at the front gate. I showed up with my hunting partner Rachel. We made a pact that neither of us could leave the club unless escorted by a penis.

Everything started out pretty badly when we got to the crowded gate part, saw doorman and nightlife guru Dima Shalya, and he pretended not to notice us. I mean come on, what kind of "svoi" camaraderie is this, dude! Lucky for us we managed to force our way in when Dima gave the thumbs-up to a crowd of Russian chicks.

Anyway, once past the annoying too-small coat check, you enter a huge bar area slash dancefloor, with pumping music and lights. The floor was packed with a great mix, somewhere like a bit prettier than Real McCoy's crowd, but not as stuffy-assed as 30/7. Exactly my demographic.

The penis hunting was exceptional, especially once the dudes got drunker. I must have had 5 dudes pay for my drinks. Must've groped about three crotches. And definitely got penetrated by one of those crotches.

The penis that I fucked was attached to a guy who's name, if I remember right, was Pasha. Aw, so cute, isn't it? We nearly wall-banged in the upstairs VIP area, a dark, awesome balcony away from the chaos of the dancefloor below. Later we left 1171 together. I don't remember all of the details, but I do remember seeing Tanya with two dudes, and yes, the next day she told me she got double-penetrated.

I don't know, I find double-penetration pretty humiliating, but I'm not going to judge Tanya. She's not a pushover. And besides, who am I to talk? I let Pasha do me in the ass. Twice. For some reason, he only likes to do girls in the ass. That's cool by me. Stay tuned for more Pasha tales!

1171

Savvinskaya Nab. 21

740-5583

Metro: Sportivnaya

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LATEST ARTICLES

Save The eXile: The War Nerd Calls Mayday
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The future of The eXile is in your hands! We're holding a fundraiser to save the paper, and your soul. Tune in to Gary Brecher's urgent request for reinforcements and donate as much as you can. If you don't, we'll be overrun and wiped off the face of the earth, forever.

Scanning Moscow’s Traffic Cops
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