Mankind's only alternative 15   OCT.   21  
Mankind's only alternative
War Nerd RSS

The Fall of The eXile For all those wondering what the "Save The eXile Fundrasier" banner is all about, here it is as simply as it can be phrased: The eXile is shutting down.
June 11, 2008 in eXile Blog

War Nerd: War of the Babies in Taki's Magazine The War Nerd talks about babies, the greatest weapon of the 20th century.
May 28, 2008 in eXile Blog

Kids, Meet Your President A website for Russian kids to learn all about President Medvedev's passion for school, sports and family.
May 22, 2008 in eXile Blog

Cellphone Democracy Cam If this girl was exposed to Jeffersonian democracy...
May 20, 2008 in Face Control

More Classy B&W Dyev Photos Yet another hot Russian babe imitating the Catpower look...
May 20, 2008 in Face Control

Proof That Genetic Memory Is Real! Sure, the Ottomans shut down the Istanbul Slavic slave markets centuries ago...
May 15, 2008 in Face Control

Russia's Orthodox Church Youth Outreach Program The priest is going, "Father Sansei is very impressed with grasshopper Sasha’s...
May 15, 2008 in Face Control

More Classy B&W Club Photos w/Russian Dyevs We took the Pepsi Challenge here...
May 15, 2008 in Face Control

Blogs RSS feed

Kino Korner March 20, 2003
Gangs Of Shite
By Mark Ames Browse author Email
Page 2 of 4
Bowling hurts, and that's what I like best about it. You can't watch the movie and not feel real sick rage, sheer hatred for America. You'd expect the Right to attack this movie but the incredible thing has been the Left's craven reaction. This is typical of the American Left, who have always wasted far more time stabbing each other in the back, clique-shuffling and double-stancing rather than terrorizing the enemy on the Right, something too "obvious" for most. Just to give you an example, the LA Weekly, which prides itself for its perfect blend of Beigeified radical Left politics and pseudo-hip multicultural post-theory posturing, slammed Moore's movie for being too slanted, complaining in their review that he was merely pandering to the Europeans' anti-Americanism. This isn't just an indictment on the LA Weekly's cowardice; it's a sign of Moore's effectiveness. He scared the fake Left. He flushed them out, sent them running for the populist right, exposing them for the sleazy collabos that they really are.

There were a few movies that were solidly good in 2002, though not at Bowling's level. Solaris, which I'm still ashamed to admit I liked, and Adaptation, which, in spite of its lame post-modern ending is fun to watch if only because it's one of those breakthrough movies that takes ideas and obsessions that you've heard in conversation but never imagined would make for compelling cinema. It's a movie that, while watching, you get a little, shall we say, envious because you got scooped and you don't like being scooped, least of all by people with ironic names like Spike Jonze, people who are filthy rich, famous, and set up with all the prescription drugs they'll want till ripe old age.

Then there's The Ring. I didn't review it here because for some crazy reason the English language cinemas decided not to show it. The movie is...scary. I mean fucking scary. I don't remember the last time a movie scared me. Dr. Dolan actually got mad at me for recommending it, saying it affected his sleep. The Ring works because it's a horror movie that doesn't look over its shoulder or wink like all American horror movies of the past twenty years. Originally a Japanese film, the American remake will definitely fuck with your mind, if you have one. Plus Naomi Watts of Mulholland Drive fame has got to be the hottest 30-something in America.

If I missed a good movie from 2002 please let me know. This is the most anemic list of must-see films I've ever compiled. And believe me, I've never compiled a list of must-see films in my life.

Now, onto this week's movies in Moscow.


I'd like to spend an afternoon at Ronald Reagan's. Just throwing things at his head, saying, "But you just said that," or, "Did you prepare your speech for tonight's dinner?" to confuse and scare him. But that's because I hate the bastard.

Do you want to watch a senile Martin Scorcese fart his way through a shallow dime store novel adaptation, trying to ride the mistaken star-dusted coattails of Leonardo di Caprio and Cameron Diaz, who are so aware that they don't belong that they even give up the bad accents during entire scenes. Daniel Day-Lewis brilliantly squeezes what little can be drawn from his character and the opening scene is decent on a big screen, so if you're the "resigned" type, as in like how Bush is "resigned" to a nuclear North Korean, then you won't mind this movie.

For those of us who expect something more, something truthful and religious from Scorcese and will accept nothing less, then this film is a cry for help.

To paraphrase Sam Rothstein from the last watchable Scorcese film ever made, Casino, in the scene when he fired the hick slots machine manager: "Marty, are you telling me that you didn't see this disaster coming?!"

Scorcese: "No, Mister Rothstein, I just...I hired them. Anyone could hire di Caprio and Diaz."

SHARE:  Digg  My Web  Facebook  Reddit
Browse author
Email Mark Ames at
The War Nerd
Burn, Malibu, Burn! : Fire: the most effective, underused weapon in the world
Travel Guide
The Exile’s 2008 Happy Planet Guide To Moscow :
Trophia Minigarchia
Field Guide To Moscow: Trophia Minigarchia :
Metro Escalator Sentinel
Field Guide To Moscow: Cadaverosus Antiquus :


Save The eXile: The War Nerd Calls Mayday
The future of The eXile is in your hands! We're holding a fundraiser to save the paper, and your soul. Tune in to Gary Brecher's urgent request for reinforcements and donate as much as you can. If you don't, we'll be overrun and wiped off the face of the earth, forever.

Scanning Moscow’s Traffic Cops
Automotive Section
We’re happy to introduce a new column in which we publish Moscow’s raw radio communications, courtesy of a Russian amateur radio enthusiast. This issue, eXile readers are given a peek into the secret conversations of Moscow’s traffic police, the notorious "GAIshniki."

Eleven Years of Threats: The eXile's Incredible Journey
Feature Story By The eXile
Good Night, and Bad Luck: In a nation terrorized by its own government, one newspaper dared to fart in its face. Get out your hankies, cuz we’re taking a look back at the impossible crises we overcame.

Your Letters
Russia's freedom-loving free market martyr Mikhail Khodorkovsky answers some of this week's letters, and he's got nothing but praise for President Medvedev.

Clubbing Adventures Through Time
Club Review By Dmitriy Babooshka
eXile club reviewer Babooshka takes a trip through time with the ghost of Moscow clubbing past, present and future, and true to form, gets laid in the process.

The Fortnight Spin
Bardak Calendar By Jared Lindquist
Jared comes out with yet another roundup of upcoming bardak sessions.

Your Letters
Richard Gere tackles this week's letters. Now reformed, he fights for gerbil rights all around the world.

13 Toxic Talents: Hollywood’s Worst Polluters
America By Eileen Jones
Everybody complains about celebrities, but nobody does anything about them. People, it’s time to stop fretting about whether we’re a celebrity-obsessed culture—we are, we have been, we’re going to be—and instead take practical steps to clean up the celebrity-obsessed culture we’ve got...


    MAIN    |    RUSSIA    |    WAR NERD     |    [SIC!]    |    BAR-DAK    |    THE VAULT    |    ABOUT US    |    RSS

© "the eXile". Tel.: +7 (495) 623-3565, fax: +7 (495) 623-5442