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The Fall of The eXile For all those wondering what the "Save The eXile Fundrasier" banner is all about, here it is as simply as it can be phrased: The eXile is shutting down.
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In Brief December 20, 2007
In Brief: Rape Victim Signs Playboy Deal
HOUSTON (The Moscow News) – A 23-year-old Texas woman who claimed that Halliburton employees raped her in Iraq is already assured of at least one payoff from the scandal: a reported $2.5 million deal to pose nude in Playboy magazine.

The controversial 12-page spread will feature plaintiff Jamie Leigh Jones posing fully naked, in a project tentatively titled, "Jones' Message To Cheney: 'Dick Don't Surge!'"

Jones recently filed a lawsuit against Halliburton after US prosecutors failed to bring criminal charges. She claims that she was raped by employees of Halliburton subsidiary KBR, and held under lock and key by KBR security guards for 24 hours during the rape.

Jones will pose in desert scenery in what Playboy describes as a "tasteful" recreation of "the Iraq we never see—the sexy Iraq." One shoot will reportedly be set inside of a container truck painted up in Day-Glo colors, featuring Jones stripping off a burqa, all done "tastefully," according to a source working with Christie Hefner.

Analysts believe that her decision to pose for Playboy was meant to ensure that she would receive at least some payback for her ordeal, since her civil case is likely to be stuck in a legal quagmire.

Antiwar bloggers have already expressed their dismay, while pro-war analysts see it as proof that her story was unreliable all along.

Bob Owens, who runs a conservative blog called Confederate Yankee, explained, "I've spent the last week masturbating non-stop, fantasizing that I'm one of one of those lucky Halliburton rapists, and quite frankly, I need some new jerk-off material. So hooray for Playboy and boo to the politically-correct liberal elitists who want to deny me my rights."

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Save The eXile: The War Nerd Calls Mayday
The future of The eXile is in your hands! We're holding a fundraiser to save the paper, and your soul. Tune in to Gary Brecher's urgent request for reinforcements and donate as much as you can. If you don't, we'll be overrun and wiped off the face of the earth, forever.

Eleven Years of Threats: The eXile's Incredible Journey
Feature Story By The eXile
Good Night, and Bad Luck: In a nation terrorized by its own government, one newspaper dared to fart in its face. Get out your hankies, cuz we’re taking a look back at the impossible crises we overcame.

Clubbing Adventures Through Time
Club Review By Dmitriy Babooshka
eXile club reviewer Babooshka takes a trip through time with the ghost of Moscow clubbing past, present and future, and true to form, gets laid in the process.

The Fortnight Spin
Bardak Calendar By Jared Lindquist
Jared comes out with yet another roundup of upcoming bardak sessions.

Your Letters
Russia's freedom-loving free market martyr Mikhail Khodorkovsky answers some of this week's letters, and he's got nothing but praise for President Medvedev.

Scanning Moscow’s Traffic Cops
Automotive Section
We’re happy to introduce a new column in which we publish Moscow’s raw radio communications, courtesy of a Russian amateur radio enthusiast. This issue, eXile readers are given a peek into the secret conversations of Moscow’s traffic police, the notorious "GAIshniki."

Your Letters
Richard Gere tackles this week's letters. Now reformed, he fights for gerbil rights all around the world.

War Nerd Summer Reading Guide
The War Nerd By Gary Brecher
It’s summer, you’ve got a little more time off, so you can read up on war instead of trying to live in whatever boring suburb you live in. Lawns, neighbors, dogs, kids—it all sucks and the best thing you can do is get as far out of it as you can.


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